Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
