That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
