i would punch a child for taco bell
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
