i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Randomize