I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
