If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
