Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I think I am morally bankrupt
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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