I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
