Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
