i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
a search helicopter?!
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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