I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
