You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
