all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
