Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize