This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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