just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
