How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
