i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
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