Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
he puts the penis in happiness.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
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