I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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