Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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