I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize