So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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