the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
