i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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