Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
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