As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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