Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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