I cut my penus on the lid.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
he fucked my hip out of place.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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