I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
