he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
