At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Congratulations! We have a period
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
