coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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