Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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