Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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