i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I will pee on everything he values.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
