So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
You work out of a Hotel?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
