white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
