I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I supernannyed him into submission
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
