Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
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