i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
