Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize