Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
