Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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