K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i just google imaged poop.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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