He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
