i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Randomize
