also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
