I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
