it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize