smell my finger.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize