What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
